Confidence As My Twin Flame

Merry Meet and Welcome to you magickal souls!!!!

I've been doing a lot of thinking recently about different things that I want to have better relationships with, similar to the Food, Family, Money, Respect and Bodily Autonomy posts I've written before.

I was inspired again and have a whole list of things I want to cover but this time, I'll be focusing on Confidence. As before, I am using my "A Curious Deck of Alice Playing Cards" which I'm happy to use again.

So let's get into it!

What would a better relationship with Confidence do for me?

King of Hearts

This card is interesting because the King of Hearts is the judge and is therefore seen as an authority figure.

I don't necessarily want to be seen as an authority figure but I don't mind being a kind of role model for others. However, I understand that I need to be confident about what I know.

This King is also listened to and heard as a valid voice that deserves to take up space. Again, this is something that I have felt a lack of.

I have always worn fairly plain and very comfortable clothes but I'd like to have the confidence to wear nicer clothes.

Do I have the energy budget to hold the love from Confidence?

9 of Spades

With this card, I do feel as if I have the energy budget to hold the love from Confidence.

However, I also need to avoid being lectured at for being too confident and taking up too much space. I know there will always be people around me who are going to want to tear me down and try to make me fit a smaller space. And they'll do it by lecturing at me.

But there's another side to this card: that I should also try to avoid being the one who is lecturing others. Giving advice from the heart is all well and good until it becomes a sermon.

Do I chase the idea of Confidence or attract it?

Queen of Spades

With this card, I feel as if it's confirming that I don't chase the idea of Confidence but at the same time, I don't attract it either.

It may be that I am shown here as Alice and looking down on it because I see it as beneath me.

This card could also be showing that I am not worthy of it, as the animal barristers are looking away and not paying attention to me.

I could be shown as the animal jurors, as being scared of being too big for my boots (or the courtroom) because I don't want to be judged for being too cocky.

Where did I learn this pattern from?

Jack of Spades

With this card, I feel as if it's confirming that I learned this pattern as a child as I was always blamed for things.

I was never seen as being good enough for others, like the Queen of Hearts wanting Red Roses instead of White Roses.

My childhood confidence was always beingchipped at constantly, even with exam results being compared to the results of those in my classes.

Even as an adult, I was always compared to my friends and what they had achieved in their lives.

I always felt small and like I didn't have any reason to be Confident.

If Confidence were a sound, what would it be?

To me, Confidence is like a trumpet that sounds and people pay attention to but it can also be one of those sounds that can work with others too.

I did initially think of particular singers and ballads or power-songs they have sung but then they didn't really fit this particular question.

What would I want it to be?

This is where I think the specific singers and ballads or power-songs they have sung actually fits, especially when I think of Adele and Taylor Swift.

I also think that theme tunes also fit here, like the ones from Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter and Game of Thrones.

I also thought of a cello or violin solo piece that holds all the emotions within one instrument but they can all be felt/experienced individually.

Can I raise my vibration to match it and increase my energy budget?

Ace of Hearts

With this card, I feel as if it's similar to the Aces in a tarot deck. It's the start of the suit and so shows that I'm at the beginning of my journey with Confidence.

I can raise my vibration and increase my energy budget but only if I start from the beginning.

My vibration needs nurturing, like the baby pig being held by Alice, but it is entirely possible for me to nurture it and let it grow and mature.

There's also an element here of letting others help me build up my vibration and energy budget as they could be represented by Alice and myself as the pig-baby.

If Confidence was a smell, what would it be?

Initially, I thought that Confidence ould be something that takes up space but doesn't demand that space, like a perfume that isn't overpowering.

If I add in food as a possibility, something like a ragu or a lasagne, or maybe even a Chinese-style chicken curry would be one of the possibilities.

Where have I experienced this?

2 of Hearts

Initially when I pulled this card, I thought of travelling but I haven't really left the country. I've been to different parts of the country but not anywhere else.

While writing this, I also thought of when I've tried new things as I've been scared and worn metaphorical armour but I've still gone ahead with the activity.

I also realised that I've experienced this kind of smell with food, especially when I have tried a new recipe or new ingredient. Until earlier this year, I had never cooked with tofu but now I have and I quite like it.

I've also discovered new recipes that fit my dietary needs so there's that too.

When I hear "Confidence", is my reaction nervous or calm?

Honestly, I think it's a bit of both. I'm nervous becase I don't want to come across as being cocky. But at the same time, I'm also calm because I've been learning that I can be confident and that I don't need to wait for others to give me permission.

What embodiment practice could help source and sustain "Confidence" within me, clearing old energy and expanding my energy budget?

There are plenty of activities that could help me to source and sustain "Confidence" within me but my favourite three are: dance, yoga, and singing.

I was always told I had a bad (more likely out of tune/key) voice but I love to sing along to my favourite songs. I also bop along to songs when I listen to them, particularly when I'm cooking. Late in 2025, I discovered I liked yoga but because of my migraine situation, I haven't been able to build this into a daily habit. However, this is a plan for the future when I'm in a better place for it.

How does Confidence care for me?

Ace of Clubs

I feel as if this card is saying that Confidence cares for me by giving me time and is patient with me.

Confidence lets me learn in my own time but also gives me well-timed opportunities to learn as well.

Despite the presence of the clocks with this Club, I don't feel as if they are timers or like alarm clocks that will sound at specific times. This is where the idea of Confidence being patient is coming from.

The clocks are just there to show that time has passed and that progress has been made. They are also decorated, so they could also be showing how Confidence can be displayed.

How do I care for Confidence?

King of Spades

With this card, I feel like I'm Alice, peeking over the edge of the mushroom to get glimpses of Confidence which is depicted as the Caterpillar.

I hadn't really had much discourse with Confidence until this year but I'm curious about how to go about developing a deeper relationship with Confidence.

I let Confidence be and have its own personal space but at the same time, I feel as if I could do more and interact more with Confidence.

I also feel as if I could be shown as the Caterpillar here with others coming to me, as their own version of Alice, to show others how to care for their own Confidences.

How can I care for Confidence better?

9 of Hearts

With this card, I feel as if the message is that I can care for Confidence better by being more willing to have more fun and be more playful.

Dinah is full of confidence and is shown here playing with a ball of string or yarn. This is perhaps what I need to do: to play more, maybe even find new things to play with.

It's not shown (or known) whether Dinah has played with something like this before but she is curious and willing to go ahead and try to play. If she doesn't like it, then she can always leave this ball and find something else to play with. This is what I can do with Confidence: find what works for me.

This was an interesting dive into my relationship with Confidence. I learned some new things and have been encouraged by the messages from these cards. Some of the cards have even confirmed how my past is still having an effect on my present and future.

I love to do these posts and learn more about myself from a different direction or aspect of my life. It really is thanks to That Witch Karena who hosted that one workshop a few years ago.

I hope this has inspired you to look at your own relationship with Confidence.

Peace and love to all!!!!