Bodily Autonomy As My Twin Flame

Merry Met and Welcome to you magickal souls!!!!

I experienced something recently that inspired me to continue with a "series" of posts that were initially inspired (and hosted) by That Witch Karena At The Witch's Inn. The series is all about different things as a twin flame to me.

Twin flames are usually described as two people sharing the same spirit or soul-flame which was split when one was born. This couple usually act as reflections of each other's deepest traumas, vulnerabilities and strengths. This connection may also be known as a "mirror soul".

However, Karena presented the idea that things and ideas can also be part of this twin flame connection as we have relationships with them. I have covered Family, Food and Money already, and because of my recent eperience, I thought I might be able to cover two more subjects: Bodily Autonomy and Respect. The latter will feature in a future post while the former is today's topic.

Autonomy is the word used to describe the state of being independent, free and self-directing. It's about being able to make your own decisions, self-governing, whether as an individual or a wider community or country.

So to involve the body is to relate that autonomy just to the body. It's about having the right to have control of and and make your own decisions about your body and health, free from violence and outside interference (including coercion). In my own opinion, this is a fundamental human right.

I have been working towards improving my physical health and in my endeavours, I have shared my progress with friends and family on my personal social media. However, not everyone has been supportive of my choices and decisions, with two people separately telling me to change my approach to how they have done it. The first was removed as we barely communicated anyway, and the second has also been removed but not for the same reason as the first.

The second person, a relative, was removed because they kept telling me that I shouldn't be offended but that my approach was wrong, that I was eating too much of specific foods, and that I wasn't eating enough of other specific foods that have helped them to lose weight. Then they professed that they were only saying what they said because they cared and were the only relative to do so, that they were qualified to make these observations because of their professional background and the fact that they have brought up children and grandchildren. They also tried to say that I could do this journey without spending money on a particular plan.

None of this was appropriate as I had not asked for help with the various foods I eat, saving money, or any part of my journey. I was mentally set back because all of the comments made by this relative made me feel just like I did when I was a child, when my legal guardian made all the decisions, big or small, about me. I had no voice back then, unless it was saying the same as she was.

I know and understand that what works for one person is not guaranteed to work for another, even if they have similar health issues and bodies. I don't push my choices on anyone. I respect that everyone has the right to make their own choices and decisions.

So I went and found my previous Twin Flame post and wrote down the questions with Bodily Autonomy as the subject. I pulled cards from my Alice in Wonderland playing card deck, the same one I used before, and made notes on all the cards. Here's what came up:

What would a better relationship with Bodily Autonomy do for me?

Ace of Diamonds & 3 of Spades

With the Ace of Diamonds, I got the impression that an improved relationship with Bodily Autonomy would help me to stop worrying about the reflection I saw/see in the mirror, that I would be able to see and accept everything that I was/am. I got this impression because of the two lions facing each other, standing in the same way and looking exactly the same, like they were mirror images of each other. Even the Diamond could be the shape of a mirror, or halved and reflected by an invisible mirror that sits in the middle.

With the 3 of Spades, I got the idea that I was either being assisted out of a teapot "prison" by those who want me to have a better relationship, who want me to know that my decisions and choices are respected and acknowledged. Or that I was refusing to be put in that teapot "prison" by those who want me to do as they say and choose for me. Either way, the "prison" was too small for me or I was too big for it and therefore I was never meant to fit into it. It's almost as if, because I would not fit in the teapot "prison", I was never meant to be controlled regardless of who might try to overpower me or how often this was attempted in my life. There is also a chance that I was the one to put myself in there but I can still be my own saviour.

Do I have the energy budget to hold the love from Bodily Autonomy?

8 of Hearts

With this card, I got the feeling that true Bodily Autonomy is rare, perhaps considered extinct by some (rather like the Dodo itself actually is extinct and has been since roughly 1681).

However, I also got the feeling that I do have the energy budget needed to hold the love I could receive from Bodily Autonomy because while the Dodo might be extinct, within the story of Alice in Wonderland, it stood on its own and was separate from the majority of other creatures. It was happy to be independent of others, and therefore so can I be the same kind of rare creature in this world.

Do I chase the idea of Bodily Autonomy, or do I attract it?

7 of Hearts & 9 of Spades

With the 7 of Hearts, it seems as if the answer is neither. Almost like I'm waiting to receive an invitation from someone else to give me permission to enjoy Bodily Autonomy. The invite appears to be on my own doorstep so this is closer than I might think, and it comes from a monarch so there is a sense of being invited to enjoy having authority over my own body. Within the story, this Frog-Footman is the physical embodiment of bureaucratic absurdity, which can be found within the modern concept of Bodily Autonomy where every decision is questioned and doubted at every step.

With the 9 of Spades, I got the sense that this card was affirming the 7 of Hearts because I am either depicted here as Alice and receiving a lecture or I am the Red Queen giving the lecture. I am either the expert and authority or I am needing to learn. From this, I feel as if these cards are saying that I have no need of chasing or attracting Bodily Autonomy because I already have it. I can either teach others how to acknowledge their own Bodily Autonomy or learn from what others have done to defend their Bodily Autonomy.

There is no in between as both cards seem to say yes and no at the same time to the same question. They both show the same situation in different ways.

Where did I learn this pattern from?

Jack of Hearts

This is an interesting card because this Jack is either keeping their Bodily Autonomy chained up and their "prisoner" or they are someone else's prisoner.

If the latter, this can apply to my childhood when I was not allowed to make my own decisions about anything. Someone else made those decisions for me and had authority over me, and my body.

If the former, then perhaps it is what I have learned since my childhood, that Bodily Autonomy should be protected from anyone who might try to take it away from me. Most especially those who profess to care but end up insulting my Bodily Autonomy.

If Bodily Autonomy were a sound, what would it be?

This was a little challenging to consider as it ties into the next question but I came up with a piece of music performed by a full orchestra that encompasses every emotion but with each instrument clashing with the others, trying to overpower the sounds and take up all te space and control the music.

What would I want it to be?

I initially thought of a solo cello piece of music but the cello isn't asked to do things it won't (or can't) do. The music would have room for every emotion to be expressed and heard. I do feel like the cello is one of the most expressive musical instruments within an orchestra When I was younger, I loved to listen to Julian Lloyd Webber play the cello while performing the music of his brother, Andrew Lloyd Webber.

Can I raise my vibration to match it and increase my energy budget?

9, 10 & King of Hearts

With the 9 of Hearts, I feel like I am shown as the kitten with the ball of wool as Bodily Autonomy. Because of this, this card gives me the idea that I need to grow into it but yes, I can raise my energetic vibration. It may not be an immediate or overnight growth but that's okay because the best things take a while to grow into and/or become. I can enjoy the process and not worry about the details of the process, although I can still know them to fully understand and integrate everything within myself.

With the 10 of Hearts, I felt like I could be either Alice or the kitten, which may be the same one from the 9 of Hearts. I could be Alice and needing to protect the kitten (or Bodily Autonomy) from those who might wish to remove it from me. Or I could be the kitten, needing instead to be taught how to protect myself from predators. Either way, the answer seems to again be "Yes!" If I were shown here as Alice, the Red Queen chess piece could be seen as a key, as having the tools necessary to unlock the wisdom that surrounds Bodily Autonomy. If I were the kitten, this card might instead be advising me that I should learn from others who have more experiece and can teach me how to unlock this knowledge as I grow within myself.

With the King of Hearts, I got the feeling that this card was saying that I am the ultimate authority on my body and therefore I am the only one who could possibly raise my energetic vibration. I could be the King of Hearts, showing that if I am passionate and truly care about it, then yes, I absolutely can do this. It could also be a warning that I don't do anything that might go against the laws of Nature. Regardless, the King is only one of two monarchs who could rule, so I'm either being told to be the absolute authority about my Bodily Autonomy, or I'm being told that I need to seek out someone or something as the absolute authority I could learn from. This card could be encouraging me to look at deity work so I'll look into this in the future.

If Bodily Autonomy was a smell, what would it be?

To me, Bodily Autonomy would be something like Bergamot. It's one of my favourite scents and it seems to be fun but it can also be serious. I also think it can be overlooked and/or underappreciated within the citrus family. It's well-known when it comes to cooking but not so well-known or used within homeware. My body is the home of my soul and should be paid attention, rather like the Bergamot.

Where have I experienced this?

Jack of Spades

The Spade cards shown within this card appear to be in the process of smelling a rosebush. While I know that in the actual story, these Spades are looking at the roses and the paintbrushes, within this image, they can be interpreted as smelling them.

There's an element of concealing the scent of Bergamot, as if it's the white roses and therefore it's just a hidden background "chorus" aroma that is overpowered and forced to adhere to others' demands.

Bergamot is definitely a scent that is used alongside others, almost hidden or disguised.

That's what I would describe a lack of Bodily Autonomy as.

When I hear "Bodily Autonomy", is my reaction nervous or calm?

This was sort of easy because I am calm and determined about this. Calm because I believe that I have the right to exercise Bodily Autonomy, just like anyone else. Determined because I will defend my right to Bodily Autonomy from anyone, regardless of who they are to me. I might err on the side of being borderline stubborn about this but I spent 11 years being stripped of my Bodily Autonomy and then another 18 to build it back up, so I might be a bit too defensive of it. But I won't apologise for that.

What embodiment practic could help source and sustain "Bodily Autonomy" within me, clearing old energy and expanding my energy budget?

I had to think about this. Especially with my answer to the last question. But then I thought about the journey I have been on for most of the last year: doing what I need to to take care of my body and ensure that others don't sideline my wishes. I could incorporate more body scan meditations where I check in with my whole body to know what it needs. I could start to practice sensory awareness, connecting with my senses more often. I will admit that I don't ground and center myself very often so this is something else I could also do. All of these practices would help me to connect with my body better.

How does "Bodily Autonomy" care for me?

5 of Hearts

With this card, there are two possible interpretations:

If Bodily Autonomy is depicted as the hand reaching down to Rabbit-Me, then I am scared of what Bodily Autonomy actually is, of what Bodily Autonomy could do for my best interests.

If Bodily Autonomy is depicted as the Rabbit and I am the hand, then I am reaching blindly for it but not quite knowing exactly where to find it.

Either way, Bodily Autonomy cares for me. It just depends on the situation as to how the care can be interpreted and applied. How I view a situation is not necessarily how someone else will view it.

How do I care for Bodily Autonomy?

5 of Clubs

Again, there are two ways that this card could be interpreted in answer regardless of whether I am depicted as Alice or Humpty-Dumpty, I am either reaching for help or to give help.

If I am reaching for help then, whether up or down, then I still have more to learn about Bodily Autonomy and how to truly care for it. I may be in need of finding a teacher.

If I am reaching to give help, then I have learned enough to show others what to do for their own Bodily Autonomy. I can care about Bodily Autonomy by being a teacher to others.

Again, perspective is needed.

How can I care for Bodily Autonomy better?

4 of Spades

With this card, it appears that I may be the Mad Hatter and in the middle of talking. I could interpret this as me needing to be more vocal about how I care for and/or defend my Bodily Autonomy.

Another possible interpretation is that I need to be more open and inviting when it comes to caring for my Bodily Autonomy so that others can join in and care for their own.

Given that it looks as if the Mad Hatter's eyes are closed, this card could also be saying that I need to open my eyes to see my surroundings (more likely, the actual situation), and how to act.

Given that this was a heavy topic from the start, I'm really intrigued by how this reading went. It confirmed some things for me, and enlightened me about others. I will definitely be looking back on this again in the future.

I would recommend doing something ike this or booking with me to see what comes through for you. My diary and inbox are open.

Peace and love to all!!!!